In the speech I wanted to go over a little bit of the background surrounding the whole business, and go over three or so marketing/psychology lessons that I learned from the whole experience. Here is a little background from one of my old fliers if your interested.
*****MAJOR ANNOUNCEMENT CONCERNING THE UNDERGROUND GOURD BLACK MARKET*****
As many of you probably already know, over the few weeks on Wednesday afternoons YEAH Academy has been home to one of the largest (and most lucrative) underground gourd black markets in the Midwest. With the help of all of our incredibly wise, affluent, and cultured customers the underground gourd black market has performed far above the low expectations people set for it. I would be lying if I told you that I didn’t take great pride in the success of the underground gourd black market… But I would also be lying just as much if I were to take all of the credit for our success. Yes, I may have sold all of our 18 gourds in the span of approximately an hour and 15 minutes, and I may have also never needed more than a half hour to sell my entire inventory… But you were the one's that gave me your money. So go on ahead and give yourself a good old pat on the back, you deserve it (well unless your one of the few people that hasn’t bought a gourd yet… If so, you should probably put a rain-check on that back pat, until you get around to ordering that gourd). Now that you have done that, I won’t leave you in any more suspense about that important announcement. We have got some bad news and we have got some good news.
First the bad news,
All good things must come to an end…. And that includes gourds (Duncan.). The underground gourd black market is going to be (mostly) closing down operations by Wednesday November 11th.
But here is the good news,
We’re going out with a bang. One last “Gourd-gantuan Gourd Sale”! After long and careful deliberating we the underground gourd black market, have decided not to raise our prices. Your welcome. Instead we have decided to do away with our “buy two gourds and get a free gourd newsletter!” promotion, and replace it with our new and exciting “buy a gourd and get a free gourd newsletter!” promotion. Were still going to be selling gourds on a first come, first sell basis for a dollar a gourd. You can Private Message me before the 10 AM deadline November 11th for advanced ordering options, and from there we can plan on how (if at all possible) I can get a hold of your money and you can get a hold of the gourd of your dreams.
Thank you for your time,
Have a gourd day!